Conspiracy theory 1

Okey.. here goes...

Ever noticed that the Rats just befor you shoot them down repackage all their stuff, so it's easier stacking for you?
I think all the Rats are just very very low grade clones, quite stupid, as they don't fly off and hide when they see you're in a much better ship.. no, they attack! Blind buggers...
First of all, there must be HUGE complexes, somewhere, pumping out those clones.
For those clones to appear in just about EVERY Goddess Damn System there must be a secret but huge transport network at work.
And since the Concord does nothing to prevent this illegal network and keeps it from the public, nor is in any hurry to take out those rats, but DO shoot at ANYONE making an honest mistake at shooting at another ship, I can only conclude one thing.

CONCORD AND THE RATS ARE OWNED BY THE SAME CORPORATION!

The Only corporation big enough to do this is the CCP!

THE CCP IS IN ON IT! THE CCP SUPPLIES ALL THE WORLDS OF RATS!!! THEY ALSO OWN THE AGENTS TO MAKE US BATTLE THE RATS!!! THEY ARE KEEPING US BUSY, SO WE WON'T NOTICE THE BIGGER PICTURE!

REBEL AGAINST THE CCP! SHOOT A CONCORD!

Err.. no.. wait... I didn't say that... I might get a lawsuit on my ass for that, or get my gate rights re revoked

The Art of Warping (Or Being Warped)

YES! Finally! I was blankly staring at a rerun of Sum of All Fears (old movie), as I noted how the ship warped back to the Icemining field (yes, still) when it hit me, the thing I had wanted to blog about for a while now! WHOHO! Celebration!

Just for kicks, when I leave a station, I turn on my flightcamera's, you know, the ones that record your final glorious, or not so glorious, moments in battle so you can replay and replay them when you're dead... or something like that.
Sometimes I even put it on fast-record, so the playback at normal speed will be ultra-slow.
Souds weird? Well not if you read my reason.

The simple reason is this.
It often happens that whenwarp starts, near a station, the ship turns just about 180 degrees and heads right, or just about, back to where I came from, which is, the station, because, quite logical, the place I want to be is often at the other side... whythey didn't build the exit-ports on that side of the ship then I don't know, and is not the topic here.

But... imagine... flight recorder on ultra-fast, warp starts and just for that single second moment you are INSIDE the ship... sometimes you even get three or four flashes of the inside before you exit at the other side and warp speeds up. Why it doesn't leave a hole in the station I don't know, ask the nerds, errr Tech guys, and is again, not the topic.
The topic is those few flashes, that just a second of images passing by, at ultra fast recording... I can spend hours replaying those images, because you really pass through EVERYONE's bedroom, broomclauset and storage-room after a while and you can truely see what RABBITS the human population is... and I'm not.

Now I don't know if this is the Art of Warping or just Being Warped, but at least it's nice to remember something you've forgotten. :)
And I'll bet you'll never look at that small second flash ever the same again. :) You'll be wondering... you will...

NO PICTURES PLEASE

Apparently I have begun to get a gathering of fans for my writing, because I get more and more requests to reguarly post new things. :)
I like that, a lot. But lately the request for my picture on my blog have come, and this I'd like to adress..

NO! FRIGGIN'NO WAY AND ESPECAILLY NOT THE NUDE ONES!
And NO I am not going to tell how I look (with my eyes moron!), how tall I am, what I weigh, cupsize (yeah, really).

We CAN talk about my sexual preferences (always a hot topic), my dress-sense, musical taste etc.

And I'll even Tell ya why.
Right now you like me for who I am, inside, my soul, warping out all this strange writing and shit, plus what pearls of wisdom/insanity I offer in chat channels. When you got a picture to see the skin that lies over the soul, you will either be:
1. appalled. You wouldn't like me anymore, just because I am not 'your style/taste/colour/whatever'
or 2. you'll like me more. just because I have skin, how I look, and not about Who I Am.

So sorry, my fans... this is me, like it or not... and if now you suddenly cannot find yourself to be a fan, then F*CK YOU.
True beauty really is more than skindeep, and that's not just something ugly and fat people say.

NO begging for cash PLEASE

This is not a funny story, it's true though... that some people have the NERVE to use the public channel to beg for ISK because their poor, need to support their drughabbit, their wife left them... it's quite simple... These people are just like Pidgeons!
The pideon, originally, was a beautiful forest animal, lives on worms and wild grans and such, until man came. The creature quickly domesticated, because it used it's cuteness factor (and utter stupidiy) to shit on everything they could find.
Somehow this became appealing, because people started FEEDING the bloody animals.
Pidgeons quickly became some halfbreed leach with wings, living off the scraps of mankind, and then mankind began writing SONGS about them! 'Feed the birds', 'Alle duiven op de Dam'. F*CKING IDIOTS!

All I can do is shout 'DON'T FEED THE BIRDS', because if you do, they will never learn to fend for themselves.
Space is big, huge, and there is plenty of oppertunity for everyone to become useful. Pikc up a mininglaser and go mine roids, check the market and go trade... there REALLY is no need for begging for other mans scraps, hoping they find you cute!

Having said this, I'd like to add one more comment.
If you like my stories and my writing, there really isn't a reason not to send me some ISK.
Writing is in my blood, I enjoy doing it, but working is so much hard work... so please... ... please, gimme some ISK.. I am poor and want to buy an Orca. *cutely bats eyes*

The Women Ship (true story)

This came to me from a friend (yes I have loads of friends) of mine... It's a true story as far as I know and it just pissed my pants when I heard it so thought to share it with all of you... both of you, okey, whomever reads this.

Supposidly some of the bigger spaceships once needed more crew than one to operate it, and so at one time, because there just were so much female applicants, they put all those women on one single ship. Quite figures that things went wrong, things broke down, and none of them had any idea how to fix it, because, well, men are just more technicly inclined and take less time to polish their toenails.

So a few men were deployed on that ship, it cruised around for a bit, and came back with a 20 to 30% pregnancy-rating!
Bloody hell! 3 men, about 40 women, and 30%... each one male... um... nope... I can't figure that. REALLY! WOMEN! Sometimes I forget that deep inside I am one, must be because of the lack of male compagnionship.

This is not the end... it goes on, yes really...

Those pregnant women were booted (hello), the rest were deployed all around other ships with the strictest forbidding that sex on board was NOT AN OPTION. Then the funniest thing happened, the women began running the ship. Not in the technical term, but they somehow became the most desired item 'to have' and so they could play the men to their hearts desire. but when docking time came, NONE of the men stayed with them, until boarding time and then again they were the most desired. Now HOW will you get someone F*cked up more, by during the voyage having them be the most desired and then be dropped like a brick, and then be desired again! Ego soars higher than the firmament and then drops like a bring into the deep nothing, to be lifted again...

Thank the gods nowadays were not that stupid anymore, to put men and woman together in a capsule... they tend to breed like rabbits and there just isn't enough room!
These days the ships thay fly with more than one on board is all male... 'because it's not gay while you're underway'. Now how's that for a corp-slogan!

Noobs... also named 'aren't they cute'

Noobs.... sigh...
We got 2 new ones in the corp and they remind me so much of who I used to be, when wide- and starry eyed entered the glamerous world of interstellar travel, with all of those uncharted spaces to explore.
Well, it's now... what... 2, 3? years later and still I am only a persec away from home, lying in an Icebelt, mining the shit out of it. oh, I fould a (quite communly used) loophole around the whole drone-flying thing... a friend sometimes let me fly also her ship on remote control, but it does mean deviding my attention to twice as many gages and dials... I got just about two virtual cockpits around me... it's like I'm seing double, but just 'just not quite'. Maybe soon I'll be able to run a double remote control, when CCP gets of it's ass and figures out why the third link doesn't work... buggerers... I still haven't forgotten the 'kind request to update your systems'... bloody dominant power-upsurbing tirants...

I think I'll just go and kill someone tonight... Who's with me.

Oh, I totally went off the topic there for a moment... Noobs, aren't they cute.

First one:
'Those Cargo Expanders, what do they do?'
'They make more room for cargo.'
'Oh. Cool. How do they do that?'
Well F*CK I donno... don't you just want to slap them around the room...

Second one:
'How do I fly those drones?'
'You buy them, put them in the drone bay, and you'll get an extra option to deploy them and make them do tasks.'
'yes, but HOW.'
'Huh? How What.'
'How do I tell them to do stuff.'
'Uh. you lost me.'
'Do I need to program them or something. Where do I buy those programs.'
'No bud, their preprogrammed.'
'Oh. That's a pitty.'
'Do I dare to ask,' she hesitantly asked.
'Well I like to get experiance in programming.'
THEN BUY THE F*CKING BOOK FOR IT MORON!

Gods... sometimes... Argh...

The worst thing is that these two ARE NOT the two noobs in the corp. They get along spiffingly, did a lvl 3 mission with me just last night, didn't get killed, though I think one of them pissed his pants while yelling 'Holy Shit LOOK BEHIND YOU!' when a new band of rats jumped in about 2000 m behind us... okey, they were barges that left REALLY BIG blips on the screen, but still.
It's the two, sometimes more, noobs in my head that really can drive me crazy sometimes...

Thank the Gods I never had children... and never hope to have... Pitty for my mother, but I'm just not equipped for rugrats that feed peanutbutter sandwitches into the ships drive and screen reply system 'because the ship was hungry'. (TRUE STORY from a friend of mine!) KIDS ARE MUTANTS THAT THRIVED ON AND SPAWN FROM THE BELLY OF UNSUSPECTING WOMEN! Remember that next time you pat one... their just as likely to smile as take your arm off. I've seen nicer weavels.

POS, or what the f*ck??!!

Right... In this message I want to post my concerns to the growing generation of people who think it's 'neato' (anyone using that word should get shot, reward or not) to 'own their own POS'. I mean what the f*ck!!?? Isn't it enough anymore for people to own their own ship, now they need an entire STATION to fit their ego in? And guess who's gonna cry when someone else, who just hasn't got such a big POS as the other buy, takes the shine to shoot the damn thing to shreds... there will be tears, bloodfeuds, murder, chaos, end of the universe... All because some people 'have to own their own home'. RENT F*CKERS! It's CHEAPER!
Not only you DON'T pay for the loan to BUY the f*cking thing, you DON'T pay for all the repairs that need to be done now and again. You just pay the RENT.
Now some people will start weaseling like 'but I just can't find anything I like in the renting market'.. well TOUGH SHIT! We don't all get exactly what we want, it's part of living to take on the challenges to make due with what you can find and be happy with that.
'But I have to wait for my research so long' is another brilliant remark I got when I stated this in a friends channel (thanks for not kicking me out yet guys). Whell here is my brilliant reply: 'HAVE YOU GOT SOMETHING BETTER TO DO!?'
Gods, guys... you totally miss the point. Life is to life, not to make more money...
Oh well... my 20 minutes mining is up... time to head back to station... drop Ice and return here to mine so more...

Hmm.. me think me is doing something wrong here...

Mass-shipping

Is it me or would it be so f*cking simple to drive a fleet by yourself? I mean, just rig a drone, type of drone depending on what you want to do, INSIDE the cockpit of a ship and deploy it, fly out fleetwise, or if you really want to get picky, load the Orca with it, fly it to a belt, and go mass-mining, missionflying or whatever all by yourself in a group. It would mean a ship for every one of my personalities... I'd love that, to be able to wave to myself.

Sigh.. I miss friends I think... Spending far too much time alone in an ice-cold belt, taking ice into my hold... makes me feel... well.. cold inside.

Ice-mining / Loads Of Cash

Well now, it's been a while since I wrote something here (as someone *YES YOU*) pointed out...
Time for a new warpminded blog then...

The point is that when I thought 'Yes, I can blog that!' I was annoyingly blocked by my own password protection, to which I had no idea what this password was. After a lot of hassle I finally found it again, and now I forgot what I wanted to write about. Oh well, that's life I guess... In one ear, out the other.

But, for Icemining... Yes, I am into Icemining these days.
The new corp, (I got booted from the last one, can't imagine why, and with a few close friends we have risen a new corp, something some of us were already longing to do. But, as with everything, the corp needs CASH, and loads of it.
The good thing about Icemining is, is that it's all automated. You set up the ship in the belt, mining, takes about 20 minutes to fill up, and then you fly it home, drop stuff, fly back, another 20 minutes. Plently of time to do all household chores around the cabin and the hold, though strangely enough none of them seem to get done anyway. What is weird is that suddenly my life is devided into sections of 20 minutes with 5 to 10 minute intervals... hmmm.. must look into that sometime... when I have 20 minutes or so to spare...

First plan of the corp is to get an Orca and make EVEN MORE CASH, and so, yes I said the fool, am spending day and night Icemining in my hulky Hulk, trying to figure new sceams to get some cash together.
For one, the pawn-shop corp was a fun idea, people can leave ships there, will be stored on name in the corp hanger, in trade for half the worth of the ship. If the monthly fee, one-tenth of the loan, is paid, the ship stays where it is, until the loan is fully paid back. If the fee ISN'T paid, the loaner forfots on the ship, which then can be sold by the corp for less than it's worth. Couldn't be simpler right, money all around.
Of course there is the corp programming and such to get something like this working, but hey, that's for the nerds, I mean Techs to figure out. But for this plan to work, first thing that is needed is LOADS OF CASH, so damn, there I go again.

It seems that LOADS OF CASH, LOC for short, seems a big problem, a lock so to speak, on my whole planning.

And WHO STEALS MY IDEA I WILL FIGHT IN COURT OF LAW FOR MY BRAINCHILD! Sheesh... you can't trust anyone anymore, not even your own mind for remembering things... Life... don't talk to me about life... I mean... I'm LIVING IT! :)